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6 Key Skills to Manage Emotional Intelligence

by Uneeb Khan

Emotions are a natural part of life. When we are stuck in traffic, we become frustrated. When we miss our loved ones, we are sad. When someone disappoints us or causes us harm, we may get angry.  

While we expect to feel these emotions regularly, some people begin to experience more volatile emotions. They experience higher highs and lower lows, and these highs and lows begin to affect their lives. Individuals who experience intense emotions may be calm one minute and sad or angry the next. 

What is Emotional Regulation / Emotional Management?

The ability to understand, regulate, and manage your emotions effectively in a variety of situations is referred to as emotional management. It involves becoming aware of your emotional responses, recognizing their impact on your thoughts and behavior, and managing them constructively and adaptively. Emotional management includes techniques and strategies for dealing with emotions such as stress, anger, sadness, or excitement in a balanced way. 

This skill requires self-awareness, self-regulation, empathy for others, and the ability to navigate interpersonal relationships and conflicts by appropriately managing emotions. Emotional management is essential for personal well-being, effective communication, and the development of healthy relationships in both personal and professional settings.

Why is emotional management important?

Emotional management is extremely important in shaping our well-being, social interactions, and overall quality of life. It primarily serves as a cornerstone of mental health by empowering individuals to effectively understand, navigate, and regulate their emotions. Individuals can better cope with stress, anxiety, or overwhelming emotions by developing these emotional skills, fostering psychological resilience, and lowering the risk of mental health issues.

Managing your emotional response can also help when making decisions. It prevents impulsive reactions that are solely motivated by intense emotions, allowing people to make more rational, thoughtful decisions. People can navigate challenges with greater clarity by maintaining a balance of emotions and logical reasoning, ensuring their actions are aligned with their long-term goals.

6 key skills for managing emotional intelligence

Identify and Reduce Triggers

You should not try to avoid or be afraid of negative emotions. But you don’t have to keep putting yourself in situations that make you feel bad. When you start to feel strong emotions, start looking for patterns or factors that are present. Curiosity and honesty are necessary. Did something make you feel insignificant? Strong emotions frequently arise from our deep-seated insecurities, particularly those we hide. What is going on around you, and how does it remind you of past experiences? When you identify these triggers, you can begin investigating why they are so significant and whether you can reduce their importance in your life.

Mindfulness activities

A 2019 study found that a 13-minute daily meditation practice for 8 weeks improved people’s mood and emotional regulation, among other factors.

“Mindfulness has been shown to alter matter in your brain,” Peck said. “Our brains have neuroplasticity, which means that they can change and grow and adapt depending on how we use them.” If meditation isn’t your thing, consider yoga, tai chi, gardening, or forest bathing as alternatives.

Practice accepting your emotions

We frequently label emotions as “negative” or “bad.” When you’re already feeling emotionally charged, this can add an extra layer of regret or guilt.

Instead of passing judgment on your feelings, you might find it useful to approach them with curiosity. This is known as the “observer” mindset, or allowing feelings to change direction like the tide. 

Engage in positive self-talk

When we are overwhelmed by our emotions, our self-talk can become negative: “I messed up again” or “Everyone else is so terrible.” You can replace some of this negative talk with positive emotions if you treat yourself with empathy. This shift can help to alleviate the emotions we’re experiencing. You can still be frustrated with a situation that isn’t working, but you don’t have to place any blame or generalize it.

If you’re having trouble figuring out what you’re feeling, you might find it helpful to:

  • create a feeling chart
  • jot down your thoughts in a journal, 
  • record yourself talking things through on your smartphone, and then watch it back for clues

Choose how to respond

In most cases, we have a choice regarding your emotional reaction. If you tend to react to feelings of anger by lashing out at people, you’re probably aware of the negative impact it has on your relationships. You may also notice that it does not feel right. Or, while it feels good at the time, the consequences are unpleasant.

Recognize that you can choose how you will respond the next time you feel angry or afraid. That acknowledgment is powerful. Can you try a different response instead of lashing out? Is it possible for you to express your anger to someone rather than confronting them? Consider what will happen if you modify your responses. What were your thoughts? What was the other person’s reaction?

Seek Professional Support

Managing our own emotions can be challenging. It requires a high level of self-awareness. When we are experiencing difficulties, our emotional self-regulation deteriorates. 

Professionals such as therapists, counselors, and psychologists provide invaluable guidance and tools for effectively navigating emotions, stress, and challenges. Their knowledge and experience provide a safe environment for individuals to express thoughts and feelings, identify patterns, and develop coping strategies tailored to individual needs. 

Positive Actions to Help You Manage Emotions

Exercise: Exercise causes the brain to release reward and pleasure chemicals such as dopamine, which makes you feel better. Being fit also makes you healthier, which improves your ability to manage emotions. 

Be Kind: Being kind to others helps you to stop worrying about yourself.

Accept Change: Learn to appreciate what is going on and avoid being too critical of others or situations. This is associated with mindfulness, which is about being aware of what is happening in the present moment.

Talk it out: It’s good to talk. Spend time with others while enjoying their company.

Avoid Negative Thoughts: Negative thinking should be avoided. If you find yourself having negative thoughts, challenge them by gathering evidence against them.

Spend time outside: Being outside in the fresh air, particularly around nature, is extremely beneficial for calming emotions.

Distract Yourself: Watching TV, reading, or surfing the internet will most likely help you forget that you are feeling down.

What is Emotional Regulation Disorder?

Emotional regulation disorder is a condition in which a person has difficulty controlling their emotions. Dysregulation refers to the inability to adequately regulate emotions. Lack of regulation is the inability to manage your emotional state or keep them within an acceptable range.  

A person suffering from emotional regulation disorder is more likely to experience dramatic mood changes. These fluctuations, consequently, hurt the individual’s actions. 

Next Steps

Emotions are important pieces of information that tell you about yourself and others, but when we are pushed outside of our comfort zone, we can become overwhelmed and lose control. Social interaction and networking is the best way to teach emotional intelligence. Offering opportunities to practice social skills provides them with hands-on experience in developing emotional awareness. 

Enroll in a highly effective passionpreneur mastermind program that facilitates networking among diverse individuals from varied industries. Gain valuable insights for fostering and improving emotional intelligence. 

Skills to Manage Emotions in a Positive Way FAQs

What are the positive emotions?

Positive emotions such as joy, interest, contentment, pride, and love appear to have a complementary effect because they broaden people’s momentary thought-action repertoires, broadening the range of thoughts and actions that come to mind. 

Why is it important to manage emotions positively?

Being able to control our emotions can: assist us in handling challenging circumstances and events and in coming up with sensible solutions, enabling us to recognize and manage our emotions more effectively, and permitting us to be in charge of our emotions and feelings rather than allowing them to rule us.

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